Remember how Don Corleone used to do favors to people so that someday, when he may need them, they should return the favor? Err. Not quite right, Don. According to research done by Francis Flynn and featured in Robert Cialdini’s Inside Influence Report –

So, are favors like bread or like wine? The answer to this question depends on whether you are the favor-doer or the recipient of the favor. Immediately after one person performs a favor for someone else, the recipient of the favor places more value on the favor than does the favor-doer. However, the recipient actually perceives the value of the favor to decrease over time, whereas the favor-doer’s valuation of the favor actually increases.

Although there are several potential reasons for this discrepancy, one possibility is that, as time goes by, people’s memory of the favor-doing event gets distorted; and since people have the desire to see themselves in the best possible light, receivers may think they didn’t need all that much help at the time and givers may think they really went out of their way for the recipient.

But wait. Don did two things very right –

1. Concession and Reciprocation. It doesn’t matter if the perceived value decreases over time but the fact remains that people feel obliged to return favors.

2. Commitment and Consistency - People honor a commitment they make because they do not want to look selfish. And by making it clear and asking them to commit in presence of others that they would return the favors when he needs them, Don was on the right track.

Best advice I can give about favors? Stop trying to keep direct score. Keep doing favors because they are absolutely necessary evil. And yes, to fully understand how powerful they are, read Robert Cialdini’s Influence.